I always hate when someone argues with me.
Sometimes, my response is to throw back arguments in a defensive manner. A “word war” begins, which make things unresolved.
Stumbling the following verse from the New Testament reminded me on what to do when dealing with conflicts:
So then, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath; for the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God. (James 1:19, 20 NKJV).
Swift to Hear: Listen. If two or more people keep on throwing arguments but hesitates to listen on each one of them, there will be no room for understanding and resolution. If there is a person willing to listen, a smooth conversation follows through. Clarity produces insights.
Slow to Speak: Speak gently. Personally, I always love listening on debates which people lay arguments in a calm and mild manner (but still with strength and conviction!). And I observe that in the end, they end it with less bitterness. Respect is very important, since the goal is to create an understanding between two conflicting parties with different beliefs.
Slow to Wrath: Be patient. There is no need to be offended when someone questions you. Always have a forgiving heart. Speak the truth and do not bend it. Accept correction. Remember that wrath tempts you to do something that can hurt other people. That is why we have to cool down ourselves and understand the person you are in conflict with.
Let us constantly remind ourselves to be patient in relating with other people, so that understanding and love may prevail.